Luffy's Queen
by mariannesinger16
Summary: I somehow wind up in the One Piece universe, and using my feminine body, I get Sanji and Brook to help me play matchmaker with Luffy and a certain Anime Girl. DISCLAIMER: I don't own One Piece, and the song I use is not mine. We good, copyright? Good.


Chapter 1, Arival at Thousand Sunny

As you can probably tell, I'm an ordinary high schooler living in an ordinary house being raised by ordinary parents. I'm a huge fangirl of the anime One Piece, and I was looking forward to the next episode. I had recently gotten season 10 on disc, and I wanted to watch the first episode on there as soon as possible. I immediately placed the disc in my computer to start watching my favorite Anime Boy, Luffy, in action. However, that's when things started getting bizarre.

The screne froze in the middle of the intro. I thought it just might've been glitching or something, so I was confused. The disc was perfectly clean when I took it out. Then it happened.

A large red wormhole shot out of the screen, and it filled up half of my room. Before I could even scream, I was sucked in.

I had regained conscienceness, but my eyes wouldn't open. I heard voices that sounded vaguely familiar. They were in Japanese, but I could understand them.

"Whoah! H-hey! Are you ok!?"

"You suddenly fell out of the sky!"

"An angel fallen from Heaven!"

"Don't be so stupid!"

"How sudden!"

"Are you alright!? Come on! Wake up!"  
"That was _super_ shocking! Are you alright!?"

"May I see your panties!?"

That last comment angered me. I was finally able to open my eyes. In front of me was a skeleton.

"Ahhhhh!" I screamed and punched him away.

"Good! You're awake!"

I looked up and I nearly puked. They were all there. The One Piece cast:

`Soul King' Brook, `Cyborg' Franky, `Devil Child' Nico Robin, `Cotten Candy Lover' Tony Tony Chopper, `Cat Burglar' Nami, `Black Leg' Sanji, `Sniper King' Usopp, `Pirate Hunter' Roronoa Zoro, and the Straw Hat Captain; `Straw Hat' Monkey D. Luffy.

"Thank goodness!" Usopp cried. "You weren't moving, and we were worried sick!"

Silence hung over us for a while. Then I screamed at the top of my lungs.

"The Straw Hat Pirates!"

"I love it when you see fear in their eyes," Zoro sneered.

"It's actually you!" I cried.

Luffy bent down next to me.

"Who are you? Are you ok? Why did you suddenly fall out of the sky?"

Sanji pushed Luffy aside and looked at me with a heart in his eye.

"You're so beautifull, ane-chan! You must be an angel fallen from Heaven, right!?"

I slapped him, wanting to regain my personal space. To my surprise, I had sent him flying. I noticed I also sent Brook flying. Then I remembered Anime Girls have overwhelming strength in comedic scenes.

"Are you alright?" Robin asked as she sprouted her hands to pick me up.  
I had concluded that this must've been a dream. I decided to use this non-real moment to talk to my favorite Main Character.  
"Hi, Luffy!" I said as my face beamed with happiness. "I'm Marianne! I'm your biggest fan!"  
"Shishishi! Arigato! I didn't know I had fans!"  
I bet down to look at his rubber abbs.  
"Wow! Your abbs are better than I imagined!" I said as I stretched them.  
"O-oi!"  
"Why'd you fall out of the sky?" Chopper asked as he examined me. "Are you hurt in anyway?"  
"No, Chopper, I'm fine," I said as I bent down to pet him and scratch his chin. "You're as cute as you are on your wanted poster!"  
Chopper smiled and did his usual happy dance. He's great at the hula, by the way.  
"Calling me awesome won't make me happy, dummy!"  
"I don't know why I fell out of the sky," I said as I stood up, "but maybe it's because I fell out of my bed."  
"Your bed?"  
"Yeah. I'll make sure of that once I wake up."  
"What do you mean wake up?" Franky asked. "You look _super_ awake."  
"Oh, no!" I said. "This is a dream! How else could I be meeting you guys?"  
"No," Franky said. "I think you're _super_ awake."  
"He's right," Nami said as she placed her hand on my arm. "You're wide awake."  
I actually felt her hand there. Then I realized I really was awake, and I was really talking to these fictional anime characters.  
"Ahhhhhhh!" I screamed and started to back away and I nearly fell off their ship.  
Sanji was quick enough to catch me and hold me up.  
"Carefull, pretty lady, you might get salt water in your eyes," he said in a very manly tone.  
"I-I can't believe I'm _really_ talking to you guys!" I stammered.  
"Well, you are," Brook said as he walked over to me. "May I see your panties?"  
I jumped up and kicked him in the face sending him to the floor.  
"Never!"  
Brook hit the ground with a crack in his skull.  
"Your kicks may give me brain damage, though I do not have a brain, yoho."  
I sighed at his skull joke.  
Then I thought it would be cool to live in the One Piece world. Maybe I could eat a Devil Fruit; I didn't mind giving up my ability to swim. These characters wouldn't mind if I had crazy hair style ideas, they wouldn't mind if I was a bit over weight, they wouldn't mind if I was a tomboy, and Luffy could help keep me on a diet. I knew what I had to do.  
I fell on my knees and slammed my head in the ground while I was facing the rubber man.  
"Mugiwara-sama, I'm begging you to accept me into the crew!"  
The entire cast was shocked by my words, except Robin, who was pretty calm, but she raised an eyebrow. Who could blame them for being surprised? Usually Luffy was the one begging people to join the crew.  
"You want to join us!?" they all cried, Robin excluded.  
"Please," I said, "there's no where else for me to go."  
Luffy lifted my head and smiled.  
"Sure! Why not? I always welcome new nakama!"  
I smiled with tears lingering in my eyes.  
"Thank you so much!"  
Sanji picked me up and began to dance with me.  
"We have another woman on the crew!" he cried with a heart in his eye. "I'll serve you whenever you want! You are beautifull!"  
"Get off me!" I roared as I slapped him to the ground, joining Brook.  
"You shouldn't be such a stalker, eyebrows," Zoro sneered.  
Sanji stood up and angrily scowled at the swordsman.  
"You're not the boss of me!"  
"And you wonder why you've never had a girlfriend!"  
They growled at each other for a few seconds.  
"Fight," I chanted, "fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight-" I noticed everyone was staring at me. "Sorry, it's in my American blood!"  
"What's American?" Usopp asked.  
I then felt stupid for bringing up something like that in a world that isn't even the actual globe. I didn't answer and continued chanting.  
"Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight..."  
Luffy joined in on the chanting.  
"Fight, fight, fight, what? I don't want to disrespect her traditions. Fight, fight..."  
"Bakamono da," Nami said with her hand on her face.  
"Let's give the lady what she wants," Sanji said as he jumped to kick Zoro in the head. His kick was blocked by one of Zoro's katana. Before you could say `Chapow,' they burst out fighting.  
"Come on, Marianne," Nami said as she took my hand. "I'll show you to the girls' room."  
"Thanks, Nami," I said as I followed her.  
"Um... panties-" I stepped on him. "Ow."

Chapter 2, the favor  
I was now on the ship for a whole day. I was enjoying my new life. I stared out to the sea and gazed at the sunset. It was beautifull.  
"There's something about Anime that real life just doesn't have," I said.  
"Marianne-chwaaan!"  
I sighed.  
"Hi, Sanji-"  
Sanji ran up to me doing that annoying swoon thing of his.  
"You're so beautifull with the sunset!"  
"May I see your panties?"  
I punched him in the naked ribcage.  
"Stop asking me that!"  
"Marianne-chan is so cute when she's pissed!"  
I lowered my head so my brown bangs would shade my eyes.  
"Brook, Sanji, is there a private place on the ship we can talk?"  
"Oh! Yes!" Brook said. "There's a private place in the basement!" They escorted me down there. "What do you want to talk to us about?"  
"Could it be you took this moment to see me!?"  
I gently slapped Sanji's face, making the heart in his eye go away.  
"Sanji," I said boldly, "I'll go on a date with you! I'll marry you! And, Brook! I'll let you see my panties! I'll let you see more than that if you want! Just please, do me this one favor!"  
"Marianne-chwaann!" Sanji cried as he pulled me in. "I'll do anything!"  
"I'll do anything for the sight of panties!" Brook said as he bent down.  
I pushed Sanji's lips away from mine and Brook away from my shorts.  
"Favor first," I said. "Please help me to get Luffy married to Nami!"  
"Eeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!?" they cried. "You're shipping those two!?"  
"Have been since I first found out about you," I said with a wink.  
"Hell no!" Sanji roared. "Nami-san is mine and mine alone! I won't hand her over to that moron of a Cap-"  
I made my eyes sparkle.  
"You have me."  
"I'll do it!" Sanji cried with a heart in his eye.  
"Marianne-san," Brook said, "I'm sorry, but I must decline. It's not up to us to decide who gets married and who doesn't. Nature must take its course alone. I'm sorry, but I can't hel-"  
I pulled on my shorts.  
"Panties."  
"I'll do it!" Brook cried.  
"But how?" Sanji asked, now serious. "Nami-san isn't into Luffy, and Luffy's so stupid he probably doesn't even know what love means."  
"Don't worry!" I said. "I already came up with three easy steps! Step 1: Use Luffy's stupidity against him and get him to think that he needs a Pirate Queen! Step 2: Get Nami to talk about Luffy, and if her reactions are what we're looking for, I'll press her for liking him! Step 3: Put them in a secret place, have Brook play a romantic song, I'll sing it, and CHAPOW! Happy ending!"  
"Oh, I knew you had a plan! You're so beautiful and awesome and smart, Marianne-chan!"  
"Of course I am! Now, let's get to it in the morning!"

Morning

The first step of our plan involved me getting a book from Robin. Sanji and I decided to do it together, mainly because Sanji wanted to see Robin.  
"Robin-chwaaan!"  
"Hi, Sanji. Marianne."  
"Hi, Robin," I said with my arm around Sanji's, trying to keep him under control. "We're looking for a book about Kings and Queens. You know, how a King can't become King without a Queen?"  
"Oh, yes, I have a copy of that," Robin said as she sprouted her hand on a shelf to bring the book down. "Here you go. Take care of it."  
"We will. We'll return it soon."  
Sanji's next role was to open Luffy to chaper 3. Luffy was sitting on the edge of the ship fishing with Usopp.  
"Oi, Luffy."  
"Hm? Oh! Hi, Sanji!"  
"Hi!"  
"Luffy, I've been doing some research about kings," Sanji said as he lighted a cigarette, "a King can't become a King without a Queen. And yes, that includes the Pirate King."  
Silence hung over them for a while.  
"Uh, Luffy?" Usopp said as he waved his hand in front of Luffy's face. "You ok? Luffy?"  
"Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!? Are you serious!?"  
Luffy was now literally on top of Sanji's chest, tugging at his tux, and Sanji had to bend over backwards so his spine wouldn't snap.  
"Get off me!" Sanji roared as he kicked him off.  
"Where does it say anything like that!?" Luffy cried.  
"Right here!" Sanji roared as he shoved the book in his face.  
"So... in order for me to become the Pirate King I have to get married!?"  
"That's what it says."  
Luffy moaned as he walked in place, trying not to faint.  
"C-calm down, Luffy," Usopp said as he helped hold him up. "H-have you ever been in love?"  
"I didn't think I'd need to be," Luffy said weakly. "Although... Hancock wants to marry me."  
"Nani!?" Sanji muttered.  
"Oh no, I forgot about Hancock," I whispered.  
"Hancock?" Usopp asked. "Boa Hancock? The Snake Princess?"  
"Y-yeah," Luffy said as he regained his balance. "She said she wanted to marry me. Maybe I should take her up on her offer."  
Sanji dropped his cigarette.  
"Oh no," he whispered, "Marianne-chan'll be mad at me."  
"No, no, no," I whispered to myself, "if Luffy gets to Hancock my shipping heart will be broken. NaruSaku was lost with NaruHina, I won't let the same thing happen to LuNa! I have to talk to Nami!"

Chapter 3, Desperate Messures

I quickly walked over to Nami, who was now looking at a map telling Franky which way to go to get to Amazon Lilly; the island of women.  
"Um, hi, Nami."  
"Oh, hi! You're Marianne, right?"  
"Right," I said. "I-I wanted to ask you something."  
"Yes?"  
I already knew the answer, but I needed to press her.  
"How did you officially join this crew?"  
"Offically?" Nami asked as she put her map down. "Offically. Well, it's kind of a long story."  
"I've got time."  
You people already know all this. You don't need to hear it again. But, when Nami spoke about Luffy, her eyes were half open and her smile was kind. When she spoke it was like she was speaking to the Lord Himself.  
"I owe everything to him. My money, my skills... my life. I want to help him become the Pirate King, like he helped me regain my liberty."  
"Oh," I said as I looked up at her and smiled. "You really like him, huh?"  
"Oh, yes! He is my dear friend!"  
I slammed my head on the rale. That wasn't the answer I was looking for. I knew I had to press.  
"Nami, have you ever been into romance?"  
"No," Nami said as she looked back at her map, "I never really got into romance, because all the men that proposed to me, I just used to my advantage to take the ring to get belis for Arlong. Plus, they were all so damn cheap!"  
"Well," I said as I scooted closer to her, "I hear rumors that the One Piece is worth a ton of belis!"  
Nami's eyes were shaded.  
"I know what you're up to," she said. "You're trying to get me to betray my Captain so he and the others will be stranded about the seas, and our treasure is all yours." She lifted her head and beli signs were in her eyes. "Well plan failed! There is no way I am betraying Luffy!"  
I would normally assume she was acting this way for Luffy, but her eyes gave her away. She just cared about her money.  
"You're right," I said, "you got me. How stupid I was to try and steal treasure from you guys! Next time you get treasure, can you share at least one beli with me?"  
"Sure. Just stay away from _my_ treasure!"  
"Ok!"  
I walked away and frowned. We were getting nowhere fast. I walked over to Sanji and Brook to try and ask them what they think we should do.  
"The beautifull Marianne-chan will be mine! I wonder how she looks in a wedding dress!?"  
"I wonder what type of panties she wears."  
"Hoh! I can't wait to see them, too!"  
"I do hope Luffy-san and Nami-san get together soon! I can't wait to see Marianne-san's panties!"  
"I hope she lets me take pictures!"  
I slammed their heads into each other and screamed at the top of my lungs.  
"Am I the only one who cares about their happiness!? You two are perverts!"  
"Don't flatter us," they both said.  
I grunted and kicked them into the wall and I screamed in anger. We don't have many pervs in the USA.  
"Don't worry," Robin said behind my back, "you'll get used to them."  
Franky burst onto the deck.  
"Did someone ask for a pervert!?" he cried as he did his awesome robot pose. "I'm a _super_ pervert!"  
He has never peeked on a naked woman in his life, he just likes to wear speedos. I had an idea. Sanji and Brook needed punishment, and I figured a " _super_ " masculine cyborg could do it better than I could.  
"Hey, Franky," I whispered in his ear with a smirk, "Sanji and Brook claim to be better perverts than you."  
"Whaaaat!?" Franky cried. He angrily stomped over to Sanji and Brook, scaring them as they stared at his robotic face and sitting in his shadow. "No one is a _super_ better pervert than me!"  
He then proceeded to beat them up.  
I decided to go press Luffy this time. Then I felt stupid, `cause Luffy's stupid. But I was out of options, besides, Luffy isn't _that_ dumb! Right? ... RIGHT!? (Wrong)  
"Hi, Luffy!" I said happily as I walked up to him. "Whatcha doin'?"  
"Cloud watching," Luffy said as he was holding his hat in place. "Ha! That one kind of looks like bear meat!"  
I looked up at the cloud. I saw a jellyfish.  
"If you say so," I said. "Anyways, Luffy, Nami told me how she officially joined your crew."  
"Hm? Oh yeah! I remember tha-"  
"Why did you help her!?" I roared, getting in his face.  
"Uh-"  
"Did you hold a grudge against Arlong!? Do you not like Fishmen!?" I smirked. "Did you love her?"  
"Love?" Luffy asked with his head tilted as question marks floated around him.  
I sighed.  
"Never mind."  
I walked away. The first two steps were failures, so I had to rely on the third. I definitely needed Sanji and Brook's help for this next step. But first, I needed help from Chopper.  
"Chopper," I said as I humbly entered his office.  
"Oh! Marianne, hi! Welcome to my office!"  
I giggled at the thought of a reindeer being a doctor.  
"Chopper, I suffer from insomnia," I lied. "And my father, a very skilled doctor, told me to take sleeping medicine every day. But, I used my last pill last night. Could you make me some more please?"  
"Sure!" It took a few minutes, but Chopper did it. "Here you go! It will knock you out in a second!"  
"Thanks!" I said as I left. "Sanji!"  
Sanji ran up to me in the blink of an eye with a heart in his eye.  
"Marianne-chwan! You called!?"  
"Sanji," I whispered, "could you serve meat and a smoothie to Luffy and Nami? And put this in their servings?"  
"Of course!" he cried as he quickly got to work.  
He lingered a bit when he served Nami and left as quickly as possible when he served Luffy.  
"Will that do?" he asked.  
Luffy and Nami passed out on the spot.  
"Come. You, Brook and I are going for a ride," I said.  
Sanji literally kicked Brook onto Mini Merry so we could go for a joy ride.  
"Franky," I said, "Sanji, Brook and I are going for a spin. We'll be back soon."  
"Alright! Have _super_ fun!"  
He didn't notice that we had snuck the unconscious Luffy and Nami on the Mini Merry.  
"So where're we taking Luffy-san and Nami-san, Marianne-san?" Brook asked.  
"You'll see," I said.

Chapter 4, The dance

Nami was the first to wake up. She was in a large, damp cave with only a few rocks.  
"Where am I?" she asked. She jumped when she heard snoring. When she looked over her shoulder, she saw Luffy lying next to her. "Wake up!" she cried as she shook him.  
Luffy sat up and Nami was holding his upper body up so he wouldn't fall forward.  
"Where am I?"  
"I don't know, but it's obviously a cave."  
Luffy stood up.  
"Well, we'd better find our way out."  
Sanji, Brook and I were watching from behind the walls.  
"Ready?" I asked.  
"Marianne-san," Brook said, "I fail to see how this will make them fall in love."  
"Trust me! This is the best way to get two people to fall in love!" I said with a snicker.  
"Nami-san," Sanji whined in the corner, "I can't believe I'm loosing you, my dear, beautifull, strong, wonderfull Nami-san."  
"Don't go emo on us!" I cried.  
Brook started to play the piano for the melody `Tale as old as Time' from Beauty and the Beast.  
"Where's that music coming from?" Nami asked.  
"Don't think you can get out so easilly," I said, disguising my voice. "The only way out of here is to dance to the melody."  
"Dance?"  
I picked up the microphone and sang along to the melody, no longer disguising my voice.  
" _Tale as old as Time. True as it can be. Barely even friends, then somebody bends, unexpectedly. Just a little chance. Small to say the least, both a little scared, neither one prepared, beauty and the beast."_  
Luffy held his hand out and smiled like an idiot.  
"May I have this dance?"  
Nami smiled and took his hand.  
"Sure. Why not?"  
" _Ever just the same. Ever a surprise. Ever as before, ever just as sure, as the sun will rise! Tale as old as time, tune as old as song. Bitter sweet and strange, finding you can change, learning you were wrong. Certain as the sun. Rising in the East, tale as old as time, song as old as rhyme, Beauty and the Beast. Tale as old as time, song as old as rhyme, Beauty and... the Beast._ "  
Brook played it over again, leaving them time to dance.  
"Nami."  
"Yeah?"  
"Since we're in private, I can tell you something I could never tell you before," Luffy said with his eyes shaded. "When I first saw your eyes, I knew right there and then you would be my navigator. About a few weeks after you and I defeated Buggy, I felt I wanted you to be more than my navigator. I wanted you to help me rule the ocean. Honestly, I wanted to ask you right away. Then we met Sanji. Seeing as how women obsessive he was, I knew you could never be my partner. And when I saw you stabbing yourself, angry at Arlong, I was outraged. I then did something I wanted to do right before we met Sanji. I let you wear my hat. I decided to put my desires in the back of my mind, and waited for the right oportunity, and in the mean time... to keep watching over you. I kept the ring I made for you for closure." He got down on his right knee. "Now, I feel is the time to finally show it to you." He reached in his pocket. "I needed a Queen anyway. Nami..." He held up the pearl ring and Nami's eyes flashed beli signs when she estimated the price. "Will you be my Pirate Queen?"  
Nami's eyes went back to normal. She was as speachless as any girl would be when they were proposed to. She only nodded and hugged him.  
"Come on," I grunted, "come on, come on, kiss him...!" She kissed him. "Yes! Chapow!"  
"Nami-saann...," Sanji weeped.

Chapter 5, Run away Bride

We now turn to the island of women, Amazon Lilly. Margaret was running happily at full speed to the palace with a large smile spread across her face.  
"Hancock-sama!" she cried as she eargerly entered the palace and immediantly bowed. "I bring good news. Luffy-sama is getting married to his `beautifull' navigator Nami!"  
Hancock's eyes narrowed as she stood up, furious.  
"What!?"  
"Yes," Margaret said happily, "Luffy-sama was nice enough to invite us! I bet you want to be there to support the one you love. Right, Hancock-sama?"  
Hancock slapped Margaret to the ground. Margaret held the cheek where she was slapped, blushed, and hearts appeared in her eyes along with a smile.  
"Luffy cannot be with anyone but me," Hancock sneered.  
Back on Sunny Go, Nami was fixing up her hair, putting it in a brade. Then she put on her vaile, smiled, and fixed her dress.  
Then Hancock suddenly came in through the door.  
"Huh!? Who're you?" Nami cried. She smiled and hearts formed in her eyes. "You're beautifull!"  
Hancock walked forward to her, making Nami grow suspiscious and loose the hearts and take a step back.  
Hancock made her hands the usuall heart shape.  
"Mero-Mero mero!"

Nami stepped back and spread out her arms, but it didn't help. She was turned to stone. She was still holding her bouquet.  
Hancock had taken Nami and tossed her to the bottum of the ocean, then she hopped on her ship which was very far from Sunny Go. (People in this Anime are great jumpers. 'Nuff said.)  
Because there was no one else, Chopper was the one to escort Nami to her groom. He decided to do this in Heavy Point, because he felt more human, even though he really isn't a human. When he entered, he was confused, because Nami wasn't there.  
"Nami," he called. "Are you ready? The ceramony's starting." After ten seconds of searching her room, he caught onto what happened. He rushed out of the room. "Miina! Something happened to Nami, she's gone!"  
"What!?" Luffy cried.  
"Run away bride! Run away bride!" Franky cried.  
"Where could she have `run away' to!?" Zoro sneered. "There's nowhere to go from here but out to sea!"  
"I'll go check and see if Mini Merry and White Rocking Horse are still in the docks!" Usopp said as he rushed to the basement.  
"Nami-swaaan!" Sanji cried in dispair as he fell on his knees.  
"Did she... run away?" Luffy asked, his skin turning pale.  
"N-no!" I said, trying to keep him calm. "I-I don't think she did!"  
"Nami-san left me!"  
"She's getting married to Luffy!" I roared as I kicked him.  
"The mini boats are still here!" Usopp called.  
"Something or someone must've taken her," Robin said calmly as she stood up.  
"Don't be so calm about it!" Chopper cried.  
"No," I whispered, "I won't let LuNa get destroyed like NaruSaku..."  
"What're you muttering about?" Zoro asked as he turned to face me.  
I sighed and fixed my Shade Hat. I walked over to Luffy with my eyes bursting with eargerness and determination.  
"Mugiwara-kun!" I said boldly as I patted his face. "Nami is your bride! What action will you take to get her back!?"  
Fueled by my words, Luffy fixed his hat, narrowed his eyes, ripped his tux, and walked forward.  
"You guys wait here, I'm going to go find her."

Chapter 6, Luffy's anger

Luffy ended up taking the Mini Merry. How he was suddenly able to ride it, I'll never know. Anyways, the rest of us didn't just want to sit by, especially not Sanji, who literally catches on fire if anything happens to a beautifull woman. So we searched, too. Usopp, Chopper and I took the Shark Sub.

"I can't believe I'm actually in here!" I said with stars in my eyes. "This is awesome!"  
"You're like the girl version of Luffy," Usopp said teasingly as he steared the wheel left.  
"How's that sleeping medicine I made for you working?" Chopper asked.  
"Huh!? O-oh, i-it's great," I said, giving him a thumbs up.  
"Great!"  
"You're an amazing doctor, Chopper!"  
Chopper smiled and did the hula.  
"That comment doesn't make me happy, dummy!"  
"Keekeekee!"  
The Shark Sub stopped moving.  
"You ok up there, Usopp?" I called. "Usopp?"  
Usopp was frozen like a statue. His mouth was wide open as he stared at the ocean floor.  
"Usopp!?" I called again.  
I walked up to his seat, and looked down. I saw what had shocked him so much. We saw the statue Nami had become.  
"The coral is brown!" Usopp cried.  
Still staring at the statue in shock, I pulled on his long nose.  
Luffy was riding the Mini Merry, looking around the ocean.  
"Nami," he whipsered, "where are you? Please give me a sign so I can come and get you."  
The Shark Sub rose to the surface, because Usopp needed to puke. Luffy didn't seem at all fazed when he saw his best friend loose his lunch right there in front of him.  
"Hi, Usopp," he said calmly.  
Usopp picked up his head.  
"Luffy! Oi! He's here, we might as well show him!"  
I popped my head up.  
"Luffy," I said, "it's not our fault, please don't Elephant Gun us."  
I showed him his bride's statue.  
Luffy's eyes widened when he saw what his Queen had become. He slowly got out of the boat and held her up.  
"Nami..."  
"We- we don't know what happened," Chopper said sadly.  
Luffy muttered something so deep we couldn't make out what he was saying.  
"What?" I asked.  
Luffy muttered it again, a bit louder.  
"... cock..."  
"Cock? What?"  
"... Han... cock..." He lifted his head, revealing hatefull eyes. "Hancock...!" He jumped off Shark Sub and onto Mini Merry and zoomed off. "Hancock!"  
"Luffy!" I cried.  
"Oi, Luffy!"  
"Where's he going?" I asked, looking back down at the statue. "Nami..."  
From some miracle, Luffy reached Amazon Lilly. He didn't even care what was in his way, he just stormed up into the castle that had the woman he knew turned his bride to stone inside. He burst in.  
"HANCOCK!"  
"Oh! Luffy," Hancock called in a girly voice. "How nice of you to drop by!"  
Luffy angrily marched over to her.  
"Hancock...!"  
"Oh, I just love it when you scold me!"  
Luffy stopped in front of her and growled.  
"You turned Nami to stone, didn't you!?"  
Silence hung in the room for a few seconds. Hancock's blush had faded away and her eyes were now narrowed. Then she smiled and walked over to Luffy.  
"You only need me. I am the Snake Princess. Be tranced by my beauty and kiss me!"  
"You...!"  
The beauty thing never worked on Luffy, so he didn't kiss her. Instead, he punched her. He kept it up for a while.  
"Yahmeroh!" Hancock whaled, now bleeding.  
Luffy seemed deaf to her crys. He continued to constantly beat her. Even if Hancock wanted to attack Luffy, she couldn't. Her power had no affect on him.  
"You took her from me...! Why did you do that!? I told you to the face I didn't love you! We made it clear there was nothing between us! So why did you take her from me!? You deserve death! I'll give it to y-!"  
He was cut off when someone kicked him into the wall. Sanji.  
"Keep your hands off of her," he sneered.  
"Sanji," Luffy said as he stood up. "She murdered Nami. She turned her to stone."  
Sanji remained calm.  
"I will forever mourn Nami-san, but I won't kick a lady, and I won't let anyone else kick a lady." He stood over Hancock as he said this.  
Luffy stood up and angrily walked out of the room.  
"When no one is looking, I will kill you, Hancock," he said.  
"Hancock-sama," Sanji said in a manly tone as he looked down at the Snake Princess, "please revive Nami-san. Luffy will never recover if he cannot marry her."  
Hancock looked at the floor.

Chapter 7, Vows to a stone

Luffy was now back on Sunny Go. His eyes were shaded by his hat, and it seemed as though he might cry.  
"Luffy," Zoro said as he turned his head to face him.  
The three of us had brought Nami up to Sunny Go.  
Luffy stared at the statue of his wife and touched her face. He looked at her hand and found she was still wearing her engagement ring.  
"Kuso," he choked. "Kuso...!"  
I walked up to them and held up the book you see Priests holding at weddings. The writing was in Japanese, but I could read it easily, even though I'm American. I smiled.  
"Would you like to say your vows to her spirit?" I asked. "She can still be your Queen."  
Luffy smiled and looked at me with a kind smile and teary eyes.  
"Hai. I would love that."  
I was now on the verge of crying myself. I stood up straight and held up the book.  
"Say your vows," I said boldly.  
"Nami," Luffy breathed, "you're the only other person I will entrust with my hat. I knew that day when we defeated Buggy you and I would rule the ocean together. I would give up everything; my freedom, my dream, my ship, my promise... my life... just to see you draw that world map of yours. I bet it would've been awesome. I vow to protect you from any badguys that come, even though you are just a statue. I feel as though you are the one I can live with forever. I don't care if you can't have children now, I don't care that you're a stone, I'll forever stand by you. And, Nami, even though you can't speak now, I know you'd do the same for me. And I know you feel the same way. There's no need for you to speak. I can read your heart."  
"Do you?"  
Luffy took a moment to stare into Nami's petrified, terrified eyes before answering.  
"... Hai."  
I was now ligitimately crying. So was everybody else, even Zoro. I smiled and put the book down.  
"I now pronounce you King and Queen," I said. "You may kiss the bride."  
Luffy leaned in. As his lips were about to touch hers, a beam of giant hearts came from the far side of them. Nami had regained her real form and jumped up to kiss her groom. The hearts still flowed behind them.  
We were all shocked by this, but Luffy either didn't care or didn't notice. Of course he noticed! He should be able to tell that he wasn't kissing a rock.  
Nami smiled as she let herself fall for Luffy to dip her. Then she leaped up, allowing Luffy to carry her bridal style.  
"Nani goto?" Zoro asked.  
He then felt stupid for asking that. It was obvious that Hancock was hiding and had turned Nami back.  
"Arigato, Hancock-sama," Sanji said. He was holding her up.  
"I want my beloved Luffy to be happy, so he should go with that navigator."  
Sanji put her down for a second and picked up the slipper that had fallen off Hancock's foot when Luffy was beating her earlier. He slipped it on and smiled.  
"It's a perfect fit."  
Hancock smiled and kissed him. Yes, I shipp these two... Sue me!  
"Well, Marianne-san, mission accomplished," Brook said as he got near me. "Now... I do believe panties were involved?"  
I sighed with an angermark.  
"A promise is a promise," I said. I flashed him.  
"Ni-suuuu," Brook weezed.  
I pulled my shorts back up.  
"What's worse, now I have to marry Sanji," I complained.  
"Oi, Marianne-chwan!" Sanji cried with a heart in his eye while carrying Hancock bridal style. "Sorry, but _our_ wedding is off! I now belong to the beautifull Hancock-sama!"  
"How kawaii is your cook, Luffy!" Hancock cried.  
I got down on my knees.  
"Oh, dear Lord Almighty," I called, "this is proof of Your existance and glory! I will never doubt You again!"  
Then I felt stupid, because the `god' they had come across in their adventure was evil, and Luffy had to kick his butt. Curse you, Aneru...!

"It is nice to be marrying someone as beautifull as me," Hancock said. She made her eyes sparkle and looked at me. "Don't you agree, onee-chan?"  
I tilted my head.  
"You have a very wide forhead."  
Hancock nearly fainted. Luckily, Sanji was there to soothe her and tell her she's gorgeous.  
Robin walked up to us.  
"Oh! Hi, Robin-san," Brook said nicely.  
"Marianne, Sanji," Robin said. She smiled. "I want my book back."  
Then, it happened. Again.  
The same red vortex suddenly appeared in front of us. It only sucked me in, though.  
I woke up in my room in my chair in front of my computer with the One Piece series playing.  
"It was a dream?" I asked. "Bummer. I hope Luffy and Nami get together in the actual anime. Ha. Looks like I slept through most of the episode. I'd better rewind. I need to pee, first."  
As I got up to go to the bathroom, I noticed something was in my pocket. I pulled it out. It was the sleeping medicine Chopper had given me.

THE END


End file.
